My Personal Problem
by Dr. Divinity Cohen
Summary: A continuation of My Druggie JD discovers life at the hospital isn't so easy when everyone knows everything you wanted to keep secret. Slash, sorry.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own this, no matter what I may tell people to impress them.

Author's Note: So I promised part 2, didn't I (I did, right?) Well here it is! A second part to the My Druggie trilogy. Yes, I did say trilogy. And I apologize for how long this took to get up here. I didn't want to post until I knew where I was taking it, and now that I know I shall post.

And also, to some people who were fans of the previous, you may not like the direction I'm taking this. This fic is my shot at taking some risks with my writing. I want to try out lots of different story lines and such so that I can find my Scrubs niche for future writings.

So here you have it, a sequel to My Druggie. I give you, My Personal Problem.

Chapter 1

**_Beep!_**

"Hey Jizzle Dizzle, you gotta catch this par-tay tonight. We're celebrating the Todd landing his first real girlfriend. This chick is freaky! Call me back man!"

**_Beep!_**

"J Dizzle, it's been three days since I last heard from you. You're freaking me out a little. I'm just gonna pretend you lost my number. Call Turk back, 555..."

**_Beep!_**

"Bambi, Turk is freaking out. Please call him back, he's down to only two meals. I swear if you ever came out he'd run away with you. Call him back, I'm tired of hearing about how JD doesn't love him anymore."

**_Beep!_**

"Scarlet, you've missed your past seven shifts. As soon as I get my hands around that scrawny little neck of yours..."

**_Beep!_**

"Oh, your answering machine di-i-i-i-i-i-d NOT just hang up on me. You'd really better watch your ass when you get back."

**_Beep!_**

"Hey JD, it's Elliot, I need someone to trade shifts with me. Barry's in town. If you could get back to me that would be great."

**_Beep!_**

"sniff JD, it's Todd. The bed's not rockin' anymore. sniff Turk said you were good for emotional talks, so call me back at H-U-G-E-D-I-C, not even kidding, that's the number. Sad five, oh yeah."

**_Beep!_**

"JD! Pick up the phone, now. I'm not kidding, man. Do you want your chocolate bear to have a heart attack? I started crying today! You know something, I think I'm gonna have to break into your house."

**_Beep!_**

"Hey JD, thanks for nothing. I had to bring Barry with me to the hospital and he's run away with Stephen the dancing nurse! At least now I don't have to worry about you two."

**_Beep!_**

"JD, it's Carla, notice how I did not call you Bambi. I'm angry at you Bam...I mean JD! If you won't call Turk at least call by Perry. I swear I've never seen a gayer trio and I saw Elliot's brother sing "All that Jazz" with Stephen and Glen!"

**_Beep!_**

"Don't bother calling anymore, doc man. The Todd has got his mojo back. Air five!"

**_Beep!_**

"So Samantha, your career is officially the number one spot on my list of things I don't care about, yes, you did beat Hugh Jackman."

**_Beep!_**

"For the love of God, newbie, if this is your way of saying you want to quit then just say it!"

_**Beep!**_

"Carla...no...I have to call...give me back the phone...I...click"

**_Beep!_**

"Hey man, it's Turk, sorry for the whispering, I locked myself in the bathroom. It's been a couple of weeks, where are you?"

**_Beep!_**

"JD, the hypochondriacs are back! We need you!"

**_Beep!_**

"Mister Dorian, unless you have a damn good excuse don't bother ever coming back to my hospital."

**_Beep!_**

**Inbox is full.**

Author's Note: And that is the first chapter. Intrigued yet?


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: You know the drill, I don't own you don't sue

Author's Note: Well, chapter two is here. I didn't expect the flood of reviews that would be awaiting after chapter 1, that was really exciting actually! This is what makes me love being a fic writer.

And now that I've gone and turned this intro into a sappy love fest, here's chapter 2.

Chapter 2

I did have a damn good excuse, not that it was true, but it was a good excuse. The truth was that for the past few weeks I'd been unconscious in my room or in other peoples rooms. It was wrong, I knew it, after everything I had been through to get better, but something snapped inside me, the floodgates had been opened and I had to give in to the weakness.

But no one needed to know that. For all Kelso knew I had gone to visit my mom, gotten extremely ill, and had to be quarantined in the Lady of the Lake hospital.

And today I sat in the free clinic at Sacred Heart waiting for the results of my HIV test. The last person I expected to see walking out with the results was the one who did.

"Mr...Dorian?" Dr. Cox said, looking up at me. "Welcome back, kid."

"Yeah," I said, wishing he'd just get on with it.

"Why are you getting an AIDS test?" Even through the layers of disinterest he tried to pile on top of his voice I could tell there was some worry in it.

"I fell onto a pile of used hypodermics," I lied. "Figured I should probably get tested."

"It's negative," he said with a breathe of relief he did a great job hiding. "So are you coming back to work?"

"Kelso gave me graveyard shift the rest of the week," Dr. Cox nodded slowly, the room was suddenly very awkward and very quiet.

"You know, you may want to go and check in with..."

"Must've read my mind..."

* * *

"I'm all alone, there's no one here beside me, my troubles have all grown..." Turk sang sadly. Carla had a pair of headphones secured in her ears as though she had witnessed this event many times. I pulled my cell from my pocket and called his. Suddenly the song "Happy Days" blasted from the counter. 

"Carla! Carla!" He shouted. "JD is calling, JD is calling!" Carla rolled her eyes and Turk answered. "JD?"

"Look behind you."

Turk turned around and cheered, hugging me tightly. "JD is back, JD's back!" Suddenly his grip loosened as he remembered that I had been missing. "Where were you?"

"Visiting my mom, I'll explain later." I covered. Turk was skeptical but chose to believe me. I had to hide my sigh of relief.

"You never do that again!" He said, waving his finger at me.

"Okay, okay," I said. There was silence before he grabbed me in another chocolate bear hug. "So who's going to fill me in on all the gossip?"

Carla appeared behind Turk.

"Welcome back, JD," I could tell she had been bursting to talk to someone.

"Open the floodgates, Carla, you know you want to."

So Carla caught me up. Elliot's brother had run away with Stephen the dancing nurse which upset my gay cake supplier so much that he ended up quitting, Dr. Cox had taken shifts at the Free Clinic to pass the time (although he was telling everyone it was just for the extra cash), The Todd had his first real relationship and break up, and Dr. Kelso was forced to start looking for new nurses to make up for the shortage.

"So what are the candidates like?" Carla rolled her eyes.

"A, A, C, B, male."

"So we assume C gets it?" Carla laughed.

"Jordan gets the final decision, and the male is an absolute dish," Turk scoffed. "Turk, you are my appetizer, main course, and desert. This guy is just a side of fries.

Turk smiled. "Aw, you remembered I love food metaphors." The two leaned in to kiss and I pretended to gag.

"Very funny, Bambi."

"So when do you work tonight?" Turk asked.

"Graveyard, I've got it for the next week. I guess that's what I get for not calling in."

"Damn straight," Carla whispered. We ignored her.

"So, JD, I was wondering..." Turk started.

"Will you marry me?" Carla asked. I turned to glare before refocusing on Turk.

"Can I redraw Rowdy? Please?"

"Of course my SCB, of course."

* * *

"Hm..." Turk said as he made the lines on my arm, it was a confused Hmm, one that made me nervous. "I don't recognize this spot, I don't remember using it last time."

"Oh, I must've been in the sun since last time, you know how I freckle." I held my breathe, hoping he would believe me. He seemed like he did as he attempted to incorporate it into the drawing.

"Ah, Doctor Dorian, Turkleton, slacking off I see." Dr. Kelso said, appearing behind us. "Dorian, I want that marker off your arm before your first shift tonight. And Turkleton..." Dr. Kelso looked at my arm once more. "I would be yelling if I weren't so damn impressed. Back to work."

Turk jumped up and walked away, snapping in my direction. Dr. Kelso watched him walk away before taking the seat next to me.

"So, Mr. Dorian, I heard about your little drug user last month," I tensed up at the mention of Jace Connor, the patient that had started this all. "Yourself and Perry have cost this hospital quite a bit over the last few weeks and it's about to be even more. The board of directors has reason to believe we have a drug user in our staff and they are requiring mandatory drug tests."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because unless you get your act together and show up for your shifts you'll be paying for them. Good day Doctor."

As Dr. Kelso walked down the hall I sunk into my chair. Whether he had any idea or not he had given me a good heads up. But it didn't matter. I didn't need the drug.

I can control it...

Author's Note: So for some reason this chapter was so much better in my head. Oh well, I hope you like it. It'll start to get more interesting soon, believe me. Or don't, I could be wrong.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: If I owned this, do you seriously think I would be writing fanfictions right now?

Author's Note: So this is my chapter 3, not to much else to say about that. Yup...so I hope you like it. I don't know, I sort of am having mixed feelings. I really like the pt 1 better, but this one will get good soon, or you'll hate it. I don't know.

Chapter 3

Every person is equal when you're high. Girls, guys, it doesn't make a difference, just as long as there's another body giving heat to your own. It's the next morning that gives you the pleasant bitch slap into reality. You can barely remember your own name, much less who that red headed, anorexic, heroin chic model next to you is.

The great equalizer. Where George Clooney and Pauly Shore are the same person, where you can't tell if it was Nicole Kidman you made see God the night before or some drag queen that calls himself Nicole.

That's why I always felt safer shooting up in my own house. All you get the next morning is the awkward walk to a dumpster with what used to be your favorite jacket. Some people wake up surrounded by their fellow users.

I however would spend my morning afters surrounded by crafts.

"Hmm," I sighed, looking at a placemat I had painted, realizing it was not done with a brush or my hand.

The place was a wreck but I didn't have time to clean it, I was already late enough...

* * *

"So what was up with you last night?" Turk asked. I raised an eyebrow, unsure of what he was talking about. "I invited you to get drinks last night and you said something about crafts and needing more paint."

"I must've been sleep talking," I lied.

"Were you having that dream where you renovate the Brady House again?"

"Yeah," I said, angry that I hadn't thought of that myself. "I wonder if that means anything."

"You're destined to be an interior decorator," he said with a shrug. "I don't know, I'm not a shrink."

"You know what doesn't shrink?" Came a new voice.

"Not today, Todd," we both said with a sigh.

"And that one doesn't even make sense!" Turk said with frustration in his voice.

"Oh, The Todd just had to get himself drug tested today. Clean five!" Turk sighed and accepted the slap. "Yeah, apparently the whole surgical department has to do it this week."

"Unless my diabetes pills are suddenly illegal, they got nothing on me!" Turk said confidently. "Am I right Jay Dawg?"

"Yeah," I said, my eyes slightly glazed from fear. Kelso wasn't kidding. They really were doing random drug tests. "So what grounds do they have to run these?"

"Mostly paranoia after that chicks OD last month," The Todd said. I cringed, it was still a sore subject. Turk caught my look and started walking The Todd away. I slowly walked to the nurses station to hang out with Carla.

"Hey Carla, how goes the nursing tryouts?" Carla groaned.

"They tested C today, I'm assuming that's also the grades she got on the exam to become a nurse. We've got three patients doped on morphine because she thought it was the sedative."

"Well, they do seem sedated."

"Not to mention high," Carla growled. I couldn't help but notice that most of the things happening around me seemed to be ironically related to drug use. "I'm casting my vote for the murse. He's actually a transfer from a better hospital, I'm not sure why."

"Well, I'm sure Elliot will be excited, you know how she feels about male nurses," I said, aiming for the joke.

"Not anymore," Carla said laughing. "Did you not hear about her brother and Stephen's, um, _interesting_ website?"

I shuddered and walked away, that was more than enough gossip for one day.

* * *

"Aw, Ms. Jorgie, I told you I didn't want to see you here again," I said to the sweet little sixteen year old girl with a recurring case of mono. She glared.

"Bite me Dorian," I was taken aback. The last time she'd been through she was much nicer.

"Well maybe I would if I weren't so certain I would catch a disease," I responded. Her jaw dropped and she turned away from me. I made a slight victory laugh before seeing Dr. Cox behind me, shutting me up instantly.

"What have I taught you about berating your patients, Natalie?" He asked. I thought hard, afraid that somewhere along the lines I was forgetting something.

"Nothing?" I chanced. Dr. Cox laughed.

"Exactly," my breathing returned to normal as I let out a sigh of relief. "Now go change your undershirt, Joyce. It's a little bit unnerving to see the blood on your arm."

I looked at my arm and sure enough there was a slowly growing red spot. I took off into the break room as Dr. Cox watched on, confused.

* * *

I ran water across my arm to get the caked on blood off. The only thing I could think that would've happened would be that I cut myself the night before and had been too high to fix it up. It was another minus to drug use, the injuries you don't discover until later.

"Wow, JD, that's a gusher, do you need me to stitch it?" I jumped at Elliot's voice.

"I'm fine," I said shakily, covering the fresh glowing marks on my arm. "You forget that I too am a doctor."

"Whatever," she said with a shrug before falling into the break room couch.

"So...Barry..." I started, applying pressure to the cut. Elliot threw a pillow at me and laughed. "Sorry about that, the whole me not being here thing."

"It's not big, just next time you get quarantined call or something."

I pulled the clothe from my arm and released a guilt ridden sigh. "Yeah, quarantined..."

Author's Note: So yeah, you know the drill, review and all that jazz.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: Don't Own

Author's Note: This chapter is where the real story begins, this will probably lose me some readers, but it's a genre I really wanted to try writing and I liked the new character as an idea. If you don't like it than you can stop reading, but this is just the crazy thing going on in my head.

Chapter 4

"Everyone," Carla shouted, all of the nurses and doctors on the floor turned around to listen. "I would like you all to introduce yourselves to our newest nurse, Lance Prowess."

He looked like he had stepped straight from a "Lord of the Rings" film. He was tall with a slender build and had straight blonde hair that was tied at the base of his neck. He was a little pale but had a very healthy to him. I was _amazed_ by how uninterested our female staff was.

"Was that Susan's ex?" I heard Nurse Tisdell ask. Another nurse nodded and the two glared. "I heard that jack ass dumped her the night she was going to put out. No reason at all."

I could think of one, Susan was a slutty nurse down in the OR, which would've been sexy if she weren't such a sight for sore eyes.

The nurses gave some unenthusiastic waves and "hello's" before returning to work. The new guy looked slightly disheartened by it and went to talk to Carla. She pointed over in my direction and I waved, assuming she was introducing me.

"Newbie!" I heard Dr. Cox whistle. I quickly ran to his call. "Now I know you're busy staring at what will probably be the source of your wet dreams this week, but you have work to do. Do you hear me? Work."

I nodded along, ignoring everything he said.

"Now why don't you go over to Mrs. Portman and get her prepped for that blood transfusion later today, think you're capable of that?"

"Sir, yes, sir." I said sarcastically, walking off.

I was taking notes in her chart when the new guy came over.

"Thought I'd introduce myself, I'm Lance," he said holding his hand out. I shook it.

"JD," he nodded.

"Yeah, Carla told me. So does everyone get such a warm welcome or am I just special?" I laughed.

"Nah, it's just people who won't sleep with slutty Susan." I saw him mouth her name before it finally dawned on him.

"Oh," he said with the hint of a shudder.

"Yeah, I don't blame you for dodging that bullet." He laughed and took the completed chart from me.

"Well, I'm glad I've met someone here who'll be civil to me," he said. I felt bad for him. Being new can be pretty hard.

"No big deal, man." I said. He turned to walk off with the chart adn I had an idea. "Hey Lance!"

"Yeah?" He said, turning around.

"You wanna grab a beer tonight?" He smiled and thumbs-upped me. I was glad I could help. Everyone needs a friend.

* * *

"So," Dr. Cox said as I walked into the room. "I'm not sure if I should be excited or disgusted by the rumors of your upcoming man date. On the one hand, this proves that I have in fact been right all along, but on the other everyone will have to get used to calling you JP when you drop Dorian in favor of the oh-so-gayer Prowess. I, however, will continue calling you by, let's try, Lucy. Partly because it sounds so close to your precious Lance and partly because it sounds like Lucifer, a nickname you'll surely get when the Christian Coalition hears about this." 

"You mean your sister?" I said, ignoring the man date jibe.

"Who else? Keep up kid."

While Dr. Cox continued to rant I trailed off towards Carla, knowing full well that I wouldn't be missed for awhile.

"Thanks for helping Lance adjust JD," she said and I waved my hand.

"It's no problem at all, in fact, helping others is in my job description." I flashed my name tag at her.

"Bambi, I told you not to mess with my glitter pens."

"But it's so pretty..." I said, staring into it. "Man, I gotta go, Dr. Cox must be nearing the end of this rant."

* * *

"I still can't wrap my mind around this," I said, sipping my appletini. "How can anyone stand to date Susan, even if it is just for a week."

Lance laughed. "It's my words of wisdom: You can drink anyone pretty." I raised an eyebrow skeptically. "It's true, point at someone and I'll tell you how many it would take."

I pointed to what was either a really ugly girl or a very pathetic transvestite. Lance looked deep in thought. "I weould say 6 or 7, I don't lower my standards that much."

I pointed across the bar at an older woman. "Four, that's just because she seems like she knows a few tricks. Come on, JD, give me a challenge."

"This is hard for me," I confessed. "I'm such a light weight that everyone in here is a three."

"Okay, no more game. Let's get another round over here!" He motioned to the bartender. "So, tell me about yourself."

* * *

I woke up the next morning without the usual shakes and crafts. Instead I had a hangover and some black spots in my memories.

"Ungh..." I moaned, rolling from the bed. I placed one hand on my head and the other on my bare legs. Something wasn't right about this picture. This wasn't my room. This wasn't my bed. This was not where I remembered going last night.

I quietly rolled off and pulled my jeans up, hoping whoever was next to me wouldn't wake up. I walked towards the door and a board creaked. Something sat up behind me.

"JD?" came a voice. I turned around and saw Lance sitting up in the bed.

_You can drink anyone pretty..._

Author's Note: Told you it would get weird. Hope you enjoyed!


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: Still don't own

Author's Note: So I waited a while in between these chapters for the shock to wear down. I just wanted to take the time to say that from this point on IT'S A SLASH STORY, DON'T LIKE DON'T READ!!! I don't care if I'm going to lose readers over this, I have my reasons behind what I'm doing, and it's my story, not yours. If you want to cut that last chapter and rewrite it your own way, fine, do it, be my guest be my guest be my guest. But I felt that JD in this story needed someone strong to take care of him, and I'm not good at writing strong women (which is weird, being that I am in fact female)

So to all of you who are standing by me til the end, I thank you. To the rest of you, have fun finding new fics. Hopefully they're good.

Chapter 5

A wise man once said, "an awkward morning is better than a dull night."

Well that man has never woken up the next morning next to the new guy from work knowing full well what happened the night before.

And as I stood there, watching him struggle with finding a comfortable position to sit and thanking all things that it was him and not me, I couldn't help but make a very stupid comment.

"So how many drinks?"

"Two," he said rubbing his eyes. I shook my head and stood in silence. "You need a ride?"

"Yeah, probably." I mumbled, he threw a t-shirt at me.

"You probably don't want to walk-of-shame it today," he said in response to my confused look. "You can keep it, it's not mine anyway."

"Nice fit, whose is it?"

Lance gave a small awkward laugh. "My ex-boyfriends."

* * *

After an excruciatingly awkward ride to the hospital I was scrubbed up and using my favorite hangover cure. I took deep breathes in and out, ignoring my uneasy hand, blaming it on the night before, not at all my week with nothing illegal racing through my veins.

I stared straight ahead, trying to ignore Lance who had joined me on the couch with the cure attatched to his arm as well.

"Alright, in all honesty I should've told you I was gay before I started pumping drinks into you," he said, breaking the silence. "But you lied to me as well."

"What? How?"

"You didn't tell me you were a sex god, I think my heart stopped somewhere in there." My face turned a few shades of red and I laughed.

"That's the first time I've been called something besides clumsy and quick," I honestly said, immediately wishing I hadn't.

"Well those people obviously have some screws loose," he said. We sat there in silence again and he took a breath.

"This is probably a stupid question, but I was wondering, you can say no if you want...would you like to go out again sometime?"

My mind was screaming "no" but I couldn't say it. Something inside me stopped. Maybe it was how comfortable I was sitting here, maybe it was the fact that the time I had spent with him was the only time I didn't feel like using. Whatever it was stopped me from forming the n and the o.

"Yeah," I said. "Yeah, I think I'd like that."

* * *

"As clean as the floors you're standing on," the Janitor said to Elliot, who smiled and hugged him.

"My test is scheduled for this afternoon," she said. "I've got nothing to fear except for my nervous pee habit." The Janitor seemed grossed out for a minute, but shook it off with a laugh. The two continued talking as Carla rounded the corner.

"Have either of you seen Bambi?" She asked.

"You mean Scooter?"

"I mean Bambi," Carla snapped, turning to Elliot. The Janitor shrugged, walking away. "He offered to take Lance out last night, I wanted to make sure everything went all right."

"Last I saw he was hooked to an IV," Carla's eyes widened. "Oh, it's a hangover cure, not at all injured."

"Hmm, must've been a pretty crazy night."

* * *

"Lucy," Dr. Cox whistled at me. I rolled my eyes and turned to him. "You're up!"

"What?"

"Mandatory drug test, you're up." My shoulders tensed as I walked past him. He caught me to stop me. "You didn't give it to the cops, did you?" I stayed quiet, which was just as incriminating. "JD, you saw what it can do, you saw what Jace..." he stopped, it was an area neither of us discussed.

"I had a moment of weakness," I semi-confessed. "I'm not addicted, I can stop whenever I want to."

"Tell that to your hand," he snapped, referring to the shaking I couldn't suppress.

"I'm fine," I said, believing it, yet knowing it was a lie. "I can clean it up, it'll be easy."

* * *

I shook as they handed me the results, praying that the couple of days I'd been clean were enough. My job depended on it.

I opened the folder they gave me and saw "negative." I cheered, taking off down the halls. I planned to go thank Lance for keeping em out all night, but when I saw him standing there waiting for me I thought differently. Why reveal my weakness now? May as well savor the awkwardness as it way.

Or I could find another way to make it worst, I realized moments to late as I grabbed the back of his head forcing him into a kiss. "I'm clean!!!"

"Congratulations?" He said, confused.

I returned to my senses in time to let him go and hear Carla shouting at me.

"Bambi, Lance!" He looked at me, mouthing _Bambi?_ I rolled my eyes.

"Hey Carla."

"So I take it you two are friends now, that's great!" She said naively. "Thanks for taking him out last night. I would've but my shift didn't end until three in the morning."

"It's no big deal, actually it was fun." I said, trying to hurry her away.

"I've got to agree with Bambi," he said, I glared at him.

"So are you two getting a beer again? Maybe we can all meet there."

"Yeah, sounds great," I said, surprised to find myself slightly disappointed. "See you then Carla."

Carla seemed as though she wasn't ready to leave yet, but she reluctantly turned and walked away. Call it crazy, or call it my chronic hallucinations, but I could've sworn she winked at him.

Must be my imagination...

* * *

Carla turned into the hallway and gave Turk a quick kiss. He stared at her with one eyebrow raised.

"Why do I get the feeling that you've been up to something evil?"

Carla smiled. "I have no idea what you're talking about..."

Author's Note: So Chapter 5, reviews please, no flames though.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: Still don't own

Author's Note: Huh, it stings a little worse than I thought to lose readers, but whatever, I'm not doing a rewrite just cuz some people don't like the concept of my fic. Here's chapter 6.

Chapter 6

There are a lot of things in this world that can knock a person off their feet. A rogue gurney traveling at unimaginable speeds down the hallway for instance. Or having a secret boyfriend who just so happens to be one of the greatest relationships you've ever had. But nothing knocks you on your ass better than realizing something you thought you had control over was harder to quit than you remembered it being.

Fortunantely it didn't hit while Lance was around, that would've been fun to explain. But unfortunantely it hit while I was at the hospital.

I locked myself in the supply closet and pulled myself into a ball in the corner. My shoulders shook with painful sobs and I could feel my hair plastered to my forehead with sweat. The noise in my head was so loud I didn't hear the click of the door being pushed open.

"JD?" Came Elliot's voice. I looked up at her, trying to control my breathing.

"Elliot," I gasped. "Elliot, I need you to go to my apartment and get me the ziplock bag on the couch. Don't look at it, just get it." Elliot looked like she wanted to flee, but she didn't. She sat next to me, closing the door.

"JD, you're all right," she said, running a hand through my hair. I calmed down slightly as I listened to her voice. "No give me your arm," I did as she said. I could hear her let out an aggravated sigh. "So the rumors are true then..."

"No," I whispered. "I'm better, I can control it."

"I'm not sure you can," she said. "We need to get you checked into..."

"No!" I shouted, pushing her away. She tumbled from where she was and hit her head against the shelf. I didn't turn to help her, instead I ran off, scared...just like I always had...just like I always will.

* * *

Elliot walked back to the nurses station, trying to use strands of hair to cover the purple glow from around her eye. Lance and Carla were sitting around organizing the days charts. 

"Carla, can you hand me an ice pack," she said calmly. The two looked up and Lance jumped.

"Shiner!" He shrieked. "Sorry, I mean, hi Elliot." Elliot sneered at him and took the cold pack from Carla.

"What happened?" Carla asked.

"Tripped in the supply closet and hit the shelf," she said, telling a half-truth. Carla didn't believe a word of it.

"Lance, could you go check on Mr. Lambdi in room 103 for me?" Carla asked. "Your shift will probably be over after that."

"Sure," he said, catching on that she was getting rid of him. "See ya, dolls." He added, kissing the two girls on their cheeks.

"Elliot," Carla started as he walked away.

"JD," she said. "He hit me and I fell into the shelf."

"But...why would he?" Carla stammered. Elliot felt guilty to be telling Carla, but at the same time it wasn't like he was really helping himself.

"Have you seen his arms lately?" She hinted. Calra gasped.

"No, Elliot, he's not...this isn't how it's supposed to happen..." Elliot's mind caught the last line but chose to ignore it.

"Well, he isn't. He's withdrawing, but I can tell he's thinking it," she said. Carla looked relieved about the withdrawal. "But what did you mean by 'this wasn't how it's supposed to happen?'"

Carla looked guilty as she tried to avoid the question. "I think I'll invite him back to our place for the night, or until he's better."

"Carla! Don't avoid the question!"

"Well," Carla said, shifting from foot to foot. "I've sort of been playing cupid lately..."

"With who?" Elliot raised an eyebrow. Lance stopped back by and dropped a chart in front of her.

"I'm off, we meeting at the bar tonight?"

"Of course," Carla said with a smile. Lance returned it and started to walk off.

"Hey," he said, with a look of dawning realization. "Have either of you seen JD?"

Elliot's eyes widened. She turned back to Carla who gave a small, child-like smile.

"You..."

* * *

"Janitor!" Elliot said, walking up to the tall, frightening man and attempting to blow her hair away in a sexy manner. "I need your help."

Janitor literally dropped everything to listen, which was unfortunante for the old woman he'd been helping up only moments before.

"Yes, blonde doctor," he said eagerly. Elliot smiled, happy that she had picked such a good person to befriend.

"Janitor, could you spy on JD for me? He has a secret and I want to know," she said with a pout. Janitor began searching his pockets and pulled a stack of pictures out.

"You mean this?" He said, showing her the picture of JD and Lance kissing the day of JD's drug test. Elliot gasped, grabbing the photo's from him.

"This is what Carla was hiding, I knew it!" She hugged the Janitor for supplying the evidence. "Could you get more pictures of them for me to use as blackmail?"

"More pictures, yes, blackmail, no." Elliot seemed taken aback.

"But you always torment JD! You almost killed him that one time!" He laughed at the memory. "Why won't you help me with this!"

"That picture," he said pointing. "That changed what I do from harmless torment to hate crime. It's just not worth the lawsuits."

He picked up his mop and walked away, leaving behind a very shocked and annoyed Elliot.

"Frick!"

* * *

I sat on the roof, holding my legs to my chest. The wave of withdrawal had subsided slightly, I was still shaking and my cheeks were still wet with tears. I knew I needed to go back down to meet Lance, but I felt I needed to regain some composure first.

"You lied to me, Sandra," Dr. Cox said. I turned and saw him standing in the doorway. "You promised you would never be back here as a user."

"I'm not," I said, lying, obviously. Dr. Cox rolled his eyes.

"Good God, girl," he said, sitting next to me. "Open your eyes, you're using again. There is no such thing as one last hit. If you won't stop using for yourself do it for your friends, do it for Jace's memory..." My eyes welled up at the mention and I could even catch a slight hitch in his voice. Then he added something that surprised me. "Do it for Lance."

I turned to look at him and he sighed. "Carla," he said, explaining it in one word. "You know, you don't have to hide that from any of us and you don't have to hide this from him."

There was something about his acceptance that opened my eyes. I had a problem, a problem I needed to talk to someone about, someone who would care.

"Come on, kid, let's go inside." Dr. Cox said. I stood shakily and walked next to him. As we rounded the corner he turned to me and looked me in the eyes.

"Actually, do keep the relationship hidden around me, I don't even like seeing you with another woman. How does it feel to finally be in a straight relationship, Judy?"

Ah...back to normal...


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: Still don't own Scrubs

Author's Note: Alright, I'll admit it, I've had this fic finished for about 4 months, I've just been too lazy to post. So here's the first of the final chapters of pt. 2 of this thrilling-ly depressing trilogy. Expect it all to be up by the end of next week. The end of this part kind of disappoints me, but bear with it.

Chapter 7

I talked to Carla and she agreed not to come by the bar that night. I needed to talk to him by myself.

"So..." he said, rolling his hand to try and get me to the point. "You said you really needed to talk to me and now you've got me a bit nervous. What's up?"

By this point I had had a few drinks in me and my ability to self censor was pretty much gone. "I'm a recovering drug addict going through my second round of withdrawal and I would really love to keep going out with you because I don't use when I'm around you, but I'm also afraid of what I may say or do and I don't want to hurt you."

Lance sat quietly for a few moments, taking everything in. I knew that I had lost him, everything was going to end.

"Take me back to your place..." he said after a long wait. I was confused.

* * *

Admittedly I was a little disappointed when we got back to my apartment. He forced me to pull out any stash I had hidden and he frisked my house for anything I didn't give him. 

"You said you wanted my help," he shook the garbage bag in his hands a few times, the user inside me was screaming. He took the bag and closed my door, leaving me in the room unable to see where he took it. The door opened and he was empty handed.

"All gone," he said, taking a seat next to me on the couch.

"So," I said, feeling fairly awkward. "How about you? Anything I should know?"

"Well," he said softly. "My biggest secret was the gay thing, but I think you may have figured that out already."

"You're gay?" I said, faking shock. "Oh man, I can't believe you saw me naked! I feel so embarrassed." We both laughed awkwardly.

"JD, I know you feel sort of, well, strange right now," he said, running fingers through my hair. "But I really like you, and it seems like nothing is going to change that."

I could feel something catch in my throat. There were very few people in the world that would say that to me right now. I didn't know how to respond...

And I didn't need to. I could feel lips pressing against mine and I sank into it. I knew one thing in that moment.

I was going to get better...

I had to...

* * *

I was nervous. I was _really _nervous. Having Carla and Elliot know didn't bother me, having Dr. Cox know bothered me a little, but not too much. But Turk...I did not know how I was going to handle telling Turk.

"Do I have to?" I said, receiving a glare from both Lance and Carla. "Fine...Hey! Turk!"

"What's up, dawg!" He said, high fiving me in the process. "I just got finished removing a golf club from a man's anus, we told him the last time he was here that his girlfriend was a little off..."

"Turk," I said, cutting him off from the highly inappropriate for what I was about to tell him story. "I've got to talk to you about something."

"You're dating that murse, already know, but seriously man. This guy had to try and walk here with a golf club sticking out of his..."

"Wait..." I said, cutting him off. "You already..."

"Knew it before you did, you were the only person around here who hadn't realized it."

"I am offended," I stated, Turk just laughed.

"You know that week in college you couldn't remember? The party week?"

I nodded, a classic example of why I don't drink. "Well, you didn't exactly wake up alone. Remember the exchange student?"

"Lola?" I said, hoping that was the answer.

"No, Nicolas. I caught him sneaking out of the room one night. That's why me and Shmitty kept you drinking. We figured you wouldn't want to remember."

"Well, guess we were wrong. So seriously man, Carla has been dying for a double date. When's that happening?"

* * *

**1 Month Later**

My skin was on fire yet I was shivering. I wanted to claw at my arms and make it go away, but something was holding me back. There was a calming warmth against my neck but all I wanted was to push it off and make it go away.

"It'll be okay," he whispered, keeping his hands wrapped tightly around my body. "This will pass, you'll be fine."

"Get the fuck off me!" I screamed, thrashing against him. "You don't know! You don't know!"

His grip tightened and I knew I had hurt him. "JD," he said, trying to keep his voice calm. "JD, shh, it's okay, you don't need this, you have me."

"No!" I yelled, pulling away. "No I don't, I never will, everybody says that and they don't. They leave, they die. They all go away..."

He pulled me again. "No," I said with a sob, everything slowing down around me, the episode passing.

And for an hour we sat in silence.

And he didn't leave.

I took a deep breathe and leaned into him. "I warned you..."

He laughed softly. "I know."

"If you want to leave..."

"No, I made a promise."

"You did."

"I plan on keeping it."

And we stayed there, wrapped in each others embrace until the sun rose that morning, the episode far from either of our minds...


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I still don't own this.

Author's Note: Getting closer to the end! And I know withdrawal is probably a lot longer than it is in here, but I've never done drugs, so I have no frame of reference. Don't flame me on it.

Chapter 8

**2 Months Later**

"Clean!" I said, showing off the results of the drug test I took myself to prove that I was better. Carla and Elliot gave me big hugs and praised me. "I knew I could do it!"

"Good job, Bambi." Carla said. "Now you have to promise me this time, no more."

"I promise," I said. "You know, as crazy as it sounds, I kind of get this feeling that as long as I have Lance with me I'll always be better. And not just the drug thing. He's like...like..."

_Lance flies in wearing a superman cape._

_"Sorry I'm late, I just had to stop a meteor, save a baby from a burning building, and get you flowers, Lois."_

_JD looks down at himself in a brown dress._

"Why am I always a woman in my hallucinations?"

"Your mind knows more about you than you do?" Dr. Cox said. "Welcome back."

I had been on a forced vacation for a couple of weeks after I attempted smothering a patient for telling me his IV was itchy. I was lucky he had some short term memory problems.

"So are we going to be hiding every sharp and solid object or are you doing well enough to come back?"

I held my healed, yet scarred arms out. "Clean, withdrawn, and back. Reporting for duty!"

"Maybe you should glitter pen that onto your name tag," he said sarcastically.

"Already have!" I shouted, shutting him up. He rolled his eyes and walked away quickly.

"Bambi, we are so proud of you," Carla said. "For everything, not just the recovery. You've really shown your maturity these past few months."

"Then keep your sensors on amazed, I'm going to ask him to move in with me," I said, unable to hold back my happiness any longer. "Forget fear of commitment guy, that's not me anymore!"

Both girls hugged me excitedly. "How are you going to do it?" Elliot asked.

"Okay, we're going to dinner tonight at that new Italian place, from there I was going to take him for a walk over to where Turk proposed to you, and then I'm just going to do it."

They both sighed dreamily.

"How are my ladies today?" I could hear Turk ask behind me. I turned to glare. "I'm just fooling with you man, I know you aren't a lady."

"Well it's nice to hear it once in awhile. Lucky for you, I'm secure with my masculinity."

"Wendy Jo!" Dr. Cox interrupted me with. I sighed. "When I am storming away to the patients, you follow! I thought you understood how this worked!"

"Sorry," I said, walking away. I could see Carla and Elliot both making the "give us a call" hand sign. I thumbs-upped and walked away.

* * *

"I've lived here ten years and never once been to this park," Lance said. We were sitting on a bench in the middle of the park, one of the few spots with a direct line to the sky. "I don't know why, it's so amazing out here."

I nodded, feeling as though a crazed leprechaun had come up and glued my mouth closed...wow, my hallucinations were getting a lot stranger...the words I needed to say were trapped in there, they just weren't planning on coming out anytime soon.

"So why'd you ask me out here?"

"No reason," I lied, losing the courage I had earlier. "Just thought you'd like it."

"You were right," he said with a smile. I leaned into him and he pulled away. "JD, there's something I wanted to talk to you about."

I pulled back, thinking maybe he was about to ask me what I had been planning on asking him. It would be so pleasantly romantic.

"JD, I want to help people," he started.

"You do help people, look how you helped me..."

"No, I want to be a doctor, I'm tired of being just a nurse...well, just a murse," he said, a little harsher than necessary.

"Well, that's great," I said. "I think you should go for it."

"JD, you've done so great lately," he said, doing his same trick of the fingers through my hair. "And I know you'll keep getting better. Even if I'm not here."

I pulled back. "What are you saying?"

"I got accepted to an acclaimed medical school in New York. I'm accepting the offer."

"What does that have to do with us?"

"JD...I'm breaking up with you..."

I sat there, basically catatonic, not hearing anything else he said. Somehow, about an hour later I ended up back at my apartment with the phone in my hand to call Carla and Elliot. I looked down at the numbers with the faint green glow pulsating behind them. I dialed.

"Well, well, well," said a deep, low voice. "I knew you'd be back. They always come back..."


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: Totally do not own.

Author's Note: Okay, so I decided to just post it all now. Whatever, it's completed.

Chapter 9

**Beep**

"Bambi? What happened? You never called, I just figured it was a crazy night of celebration. Sorry, inappropriate. Well, call me back."

**Beep**

"JD? It's Elliot. Lance just told us what happened. I am so sorry. Call me back if you need to talk."

**Beep**

"It's my last day here, JD. I was kind of hoping to see you before I left...well...look, JD, please call me back, I really want to talk to you. I really am sorry."

**Beep**

"JD?...JD?...JD, please, pick up. I know you're there. I'm sorry. Please don't do this JD."

**Beep**

"Vanilla Bear? Haven't heard from you in awhile, are you at your mom's again? Call me back."

**Beep**

"Bambi? Bambi pick up the phone. Jay Dee, answer me. God, don't do this again..."

**Beep**

"Greetings from NYC, haha...JD, you haven't called me, it's been over a week. I'm worried about you. We need to talk. Please call me..."

**Beep**

"I cannot believe you Susan. After everything you've been through, after everything you've seen. And to think I almost respected you as a doctor. Well go kill yourself, see if anyone comes looking for you."

**Beep**

"Bambi, Dr. Cox is starting a search party at the hospital. It would make things so much easier on all of us if you just come back."

**Beep**

"JD, Carla just called and said you were missing. I'm coming back."

**Beep**

**Inbox is full**


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: Don't Own

Author's Note: This is the final chapter of the second installment of My Personal Problem. There will be a third part, it will just be a little while before I get it posted. Sorry. Hope you've enjoyed this one, and I apologize in advance for cliffhangering. Also, this chapter is supposed to be in third person, this was not a mistake or accident.

Chapter 10

"I wish things could've been different, but I'm glad you're back." Carla said. Lance nodded slowly.

"Me too," he stated with a dead look in his eyes, staring into the computer screen. "Have you heard anything today?" He said hopefully, Carla shook her head. "Okay..."

"Lance, I'm sure everything..."

Carla was cut off as the doors at the end of the hall flew open and a gurney was frantically pushed past through the halls, Dr. Cox on top pressing the chest to try and start an airflow. He made eye contact with Carla and gave her a nod.

"Oh my God," she said, rushing after him with Lance close behind.

Elliot poked her head from the break room.

"They found him..."

* * *

The room was filled with machines and beeps. The door was crowded with Lance, Elliot, Turk, Carla, and Dr. Cox all staring in, none of them wanting to enter the room. Turk pulled back from the doors frame, storming off. Carla followed close behind.

"Turk, baby," she said.

"That's not him," he said. "That isn't JD, JD is stronger than this, he wouldn't...that isn't him. It can't be."

"Turk," Carla whispered, pulling him close. "Turk, JD was going through a lot, he was in some bad emotional pain." Turk refused to make eye contact with her. "Turk, you can't abandon him, not right now."

"I-I..." he stammered, pinching back the tears that threatened to fall.

"Nobody is going to threaten your masculinity because you're worried about your friend," he laid his head against her shoulder and sobbed.

"Carla," Dr. Cox said from the door. "He's awake."

* * *

"You scared me, baby," Lance said. JD chuckled.

"I knew I could bring you back."

"Well there are a lot less crazy ways to do it, you know."

"Those never work."

The two sat in silence, JD kept going back to his pocket and a crinkled piece of paper.

"Why'd you do it?" Lance said, his voice intense and pained.

"I couldn't take it," he responded, looking away. "I got my results..."

"What?"

"That's why I disappeared," he said. "The first night was weakness. The second was suicide..."

"JD, don't..."

JD pulled a piece of paper from his pocket. "I shot up the night you left, I hadn't for three months, I swear. I made a mistake and I'm paying for it."

Lance took the paper and faltered, falling back into a chair, not wanting to move. JD looked away, not wanting to look the man in the face.

HIV+


End file.
